How can we work out a fair arrangement?
Your primary concern should be what is in the child's best interests, but you will of course want to take into account your own individual circumstances and feelings.While you may both want a child to live with you, shared residence (where a child spends an equal time with each partner) in this way is relatively uncommon and children can sometimes find it unsettling. Instead, it is more usual for a child to live with one 'resident' parent. A 'fair' arrangement will allow the non-resident parent ample time with the child, as well as a continuing say in important decisions. Financial arrangements will also be put in place to provide for the child's support (see question 18). Separate financial arrangements will also be made for the division of the family assets and for any maintenance payments from one ex-spouse to the other.
It should be borne in mind that the child's needs may lead to an apparently unfair arrangement. For example, in many divorces the wife and child continue to live in the family home, while the father has relatively limited access to the child, lives in inferior accommodation and pays continuing maintenance. This may be an inevitable consequence of the priority that must be given to the child's welfare.
